Jacob and I received a letter in the mail yesterday that took me back for a minute and made me remember that some people are not going to completely understand our situation nor will they approve of it. I will include the letter below just because I think it’s important to share the highs and lows of this entire journey!
Although I believe that everyone is entitled to their own opinion and my own personality is one that will confront people when I disagree with their actions I do feel it is equally as important to stand behind your beliefs and not say/send things anonymously like a coward. If there is something you believe so strongly in that it requires you to take a stand you should feel strongly enough to put your face and name behind that position.
Before I include the contents of the letter I want everyone to know that while it did upset me greatly to hear someone say the things they did I am not the type of person-nor is Jacob-to let something like this get us down. This will only motivate us further to do the best we can for each of these babies!
Contents of the letter: (sent anonymously without a return address)
"Let me get this straight...you wanted a baby so you implanted 5 embryos? Were you looking to have a litter? Now five babies are on the way, you have outgrown your house, and are looking for the public to feel sorry for your STUPIDITY and help you pay to raise these babies? For two people who are educators of young people, you’re both pretty dense! I’m sure you will end up on public assistance and we the taxpayers will be funding your outrageously huge family. What a sad situation for your older child to deal with also. May you should have thought about the fallout before you took the risk of having quintuplets! I hope your babies are born healthy, although the odds are against it. Thanks for taxing the healthcare system even more with your multi-million dollar upcoming births. When do you plan on declaring bankruptcy? I'll bet it’s not far off. You are both just another case of spoiled citizens wanting what they can't afford. Maybe Obamacare will help you out!"
It is clearly obvious that this person did not take the time to look into our story before spouting off about it. I want to make sure it is clear that we did NOT implant 5 embryos...I am not crazy--I know it is not ideal--I would never choose to put myself or the babies in the situation that we are in. We did go through fertility treatments and were aware of the increased risk of multiple births however just like anyone else who has ever taken a medication the possible side effects are worth the the end result when you want something badly enough.
We have never ASKED for anyone to buy anything or support us financially. Do we worry about the financial burden it will be--absolutely...are we grateful for all of the outreach we have received--absolutely...but never have we once felt entitled to the assistance. We have been approached several times about going on WIC and other types of government assistance however have turned it down. We don't want to use those support systems unless we absolutely have to. Jacob and I are both very hard working, proud people--we are not the type to mooch off of anyone or any system. I know that our closest friends and family already know that however I really felt I wanted and needed to address this issue just to clear up any misconceptions.
Lastly, we have been very open with Lexi about the details of this pregnancy. She knows there are health risks; she knows she will have responsibilities, and she knows it’s going to be hard work for all of us. She knows though that we will still always be there for her just like we were before the babies were born. It is not a sad situation for her at all—she gets to be the role model for 5 brothers and sisters. Jacob and I know there will be moments when she is frustrated or tired or jealous however those are life lessons that will prepare her for other moments in her future. She is a very mature and responsible young lady who I know will do nothing but rise to the occasion!
See these pictures larger on the page titled Looking Back.